I’m mad at the world. I don’t think it is fun anymore. The way I see it, bad things outweigh the few good ones. It is a crime we let it happen that way. It seems there’s no more reason for living.
These past months, I acquired a fear of sunrise. The soft streaming lights seeping through my window every morning illumine not a spotless day ahead but one peppered with inconceivable uncertainty. Call me coward, but indolence has nothing to do with it too.
What has caused me that biased out look, I have no idea. But I guess the accumulation of the small snippets of uncertainty hovering like ubiquitous clouds fell a hard rain over my shoulders.
That’s why I smoke a lot, that’s why I curse a lot, that’s why I don’t go to my classes. That’s why I am tired to get up, that’s why I fail most of the time. Because I never tried anyway just because.
So don’t you scorn me. I am middleweight, average just like anyone. This is my share of angst and it doesn’t make sense at all. All I am waiting for is some defining moments that could change all of this. Epiphany, Staind sings.
20 something, quarter-life crisis, loss of love, name it, nothing's weird.
