The Twat and the Date

May 22, 2006

Last night, I had a date with the most wonderful guy in the whole world.

But I tell you now he was a lousy date. He never stops walking, and when he got tired after two hours of going here and there, he never bothered to ask me if I was hungry or what.

But I don’t mind. His smiles are enough to make me feel full. His soft fingers clasping with mine while we walk make me discount the fact that this man is a real jerk. And fuck, he was dressed so badly with a jersey and corduroy pants that I’d like to pretend I don’t know him.

But since I love this guy, I deliberately enslaved myself to his idiosyncrasies. And did I tell you he had an attention span of a twat? He would leave me one or a so minutes then he would come back beaming with something I don’t understand. Sometimes, he would walk past many people then wait for me somewhere ahead. I would ask why, and he would say he just wanted to see how I look like from where he stood. Crap, I would tell him and he would just laugh at it.

We went to see some fireworks display by the bay. It was already getting late and he was so sleepy. He would rest his head on my shoulder then on my lap as the car drove through the late-night shoppers going home. He liked it when I run my fingers through his lazy head, which by the way still smelled good after our very long day.

And when the flashes of multicolored fireworks finally emblazoned against the dark sky, he tightly hold my hand. Under the umbrella of explosions, we hold each others hand, giggled at the tickle of a wonderful feeling caused by an amazing thing above us, and smiled at each other everytime the skies exploded.

I ended up stinking with his saliva all over my shirt. He fell asleep on our date! He would have been more careful when would just say, straight to my face that I bore him. But no, he fell asleep on my shoulders then salivated!

But I like him still. As we went home from our very lousy date, I thought about a moment from the passing day which would really define him. I could think of none because every minute was his.

And that ladies and gentlemen, was my lousy date.

By the way, here, take a look at the twat.